My MS

Diagnosed with MS, Multiple Sclerosis, in 2007 began a difficult and scary journey. I have been lucky, compared to many other MS patients, but none-the-less my story is one that will resonate with other people living with chronic illness.

The purpose of this blog is one of therapy, for me mostly; but I do hope that if you stumble upon it, you will possibly learn something about MS and consider the thousands who live with the cruel disease each day. We need your help; donations, time, resources, but mostly we need understanding. We need understanding because for most MS patients, you wouldn't know us to look at us- we look just like your neighbors, teachers, doctors, clerks, and clergy. That is one of the most difficult aspects of this disease, in my opinion. Unless I am having a relapse, I don't LOOK sick.

I am hopeful that this blog will open a conversation with some, allow others insight, and give me an outlet.

Thanks for joining me!

Alison and Jeremy

Alison and Jeremy
Just Us

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Sometimes it speaks to me

Our pastor delivered an AWESOME sermon today based on the Gospel Matthew and the failing of Peter to walk on water. He told us how many preachers will use this lesson to tell us that our job is to have faith, hold the faith, squeeze the faith. He was quite irritated that this is what MOST people will focus on when reading this lesson: if only Peter had kept the faith he wouldn't have fallen. Pastor Luckey said, "We know we are supposed to have faith, preacher-man. We know what we are SUPPOSED to do. The trouble is that you are asking us to do what is not within us." You see, Peter failed to walk on water towards Jesus because he became more focused on the storm brewing in the ocean. Pastor Luckey pointed out that this is our natural tendency and that we ALL do it. But, he wanted us to know that the lesson he was preaching on is that Jesus still steps in to save us, He still reaches to us even when our faith seems flawed and THIS is the lesson or the point of the scripture.

Today's sermon really spoke to me because of the struggles I have been facing. Almost every day someone would kindly tell me that I needed to keep the faith. And almost everyday, I would pray that my faith would remain strong because I know that God has a plan for me. I believe that God has a plan for me- I have FAITH that God has a plan for me. However, almost everyday I would find my mind wandering to the "what-ifs". What if I didn't find a job? What if we have to sell our house? What if this ruins my career? What if I have no choice but to change careers? What if this impacts my health to the point of an MS relapse? You see what I mean.... I would focus on the brewing storm around me.

I learned today, however, that even when I am not fixing my eyes on Christ as He waits for me on the water, standing there encouraging me as He did Peter, He has His eyes on me. That is my FAITH; that I KNOW GOD will never take His focus off of me. He will ALWAYS have one hand outreached to me for when I stop being distracted by the storm- there is always a storm isn't there?

Thank you Lord for helping me today see that I haven't lost faith. It was with me all the time. Thank you Pastor Luckey for delivering this sermon today- it really spoke to me!
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